Day 1: At the Beginning of SAAM
“S.pecial H.andiwork A.lways W.ith L.ove” One of our goals, hopes, and feelings for SAAM this year and every year is that our survivors never feel alone during this traumatic process. Every survivor’s story matters and it is important for them to speak their truth while finding their voice. We have been educating the community on the impact that a sexual assault may have on a survivor and what support they can offer. Our program created an opportunity to have the community interact with our survivors while also showing they are being believed. Many times a survivor is not believed by their loved ones or even able to tell them. The S.H.A.W.L Program shows a survivor that they are being supported and that someone in the community believes them regardless of what happened. Our shawls are distributed to survivors at hospitals by the victim advocate responding; they bring a sense of warmth to the survivor when they are at their most vulnerable time and reinforces that they are not alone. During a forensic kit, survivors are required to disrobe and put on hospital gowns; not only is it is difficult emotionally for these victims but the hospital examining room can be physically traumatizing. The shawl can symbolically represent the communities’ collective arm circling the survivor with care and concern. If you are interested in contributing to making shawls please contact our helpline number for more information on how to get started at 1.866.828.7273
Day 2: 5 Things We Use to Prepare
During Sexual Assault Awareness Month, we are are determined to make ourselves known to the community. We are here to inform and support victims and survivors of the resources we have to offer them. We are just a call away.
Due to COVID 19 circumstances, we aren’t able to gear up for an event now, but we are thankful for this opportunity to reach people through Social Media. We are here to share our information to as many people possible.
5 things we use whether it’s at a college campus, outreach community event, or workshop, to gear up for events are:
Media Board Our Brochures in English & Spanish with our 24/7 Helpline number Water bottle SAAP Giveaways ( bracelets and stress ball) SAAP coloring pages
Day 3: Post With the Most
We will pick up the call and answer any questions. Confused about what consent is? If you gave consent or not? Call us! We are a safe place. Please call 1-866-828-7273 to speak with!a trained live advocate. All calls are confidential (intended to be kept secret). We received our SAAM toolkit from NSVRC and have hung up the posters in all of our offices in Martin, St. Lucie, Indian River, and Okeehobee Counties. The Last 2 posters are a special attachment invitation #DAYOFACTION for you reading (if you wear teal on the 7th of April) #TAG US @saaptc19 This is how the community can get involved via social media. We want survivors/victims to know we support them! Believe them! And we want to empower them, even from a distance for now Right now many current victims/survivors are stuck at home with abusers from children to adults. The abusers can be the one person who they trusted the most. Schools are closed and students are now in even more vulnerable positions, others isolated from going out to ask someone for help. They may be too afraid to reach out. But we are here to listen and provide whatever help we can to help you feel safe and to heal. When we as a community share and post, we are saying we #BELIEVE them and they can come forward #CONFIDENTIALLY. We can be educated by the 3rd poster on what #Consent means. Our 4th Poster has our Programs website where we can be CALLED directly. Our website is translated in over 20 + languages on the bottom left corner.
Day 4: An Activists To-Do List
Our program developed strategic goals for the year that we are excited to share with you! One area we are focusing on improving on is our interactions with inmates. According to RAINN there are 80,600 inmates that are sexually assaulted each year. After conducting research we have found that communication with incarcerated and detained individuals has been extremely limited. In an effort to increase the interaction we will also be developing workshops to one of the facilities per year. We will be creating new brochures only for detainees and inmates about our program. Just because of their current status doesn’t mean they shouldn’t be allowed to receive help from our rape crisis center. We believe and help EVERYONE! According to the statistics collected by RAINN 75% of sexual assaults go unreported. Our helpline receives several calls assisting someone with a crisis at hand and able to provide information of referrals if needed. We feel that partnering with other community agencies who work with more non-reporting victims we will be able to reach more people through our workshops! Also we will be distributing and creating more tear-off posters for each population and have them posted in schools, medical facilities, restaurants, places of worship,and other businesses with info about our program and the helpline number to make the public aware of our program and services that we offer. We are also hoping to receive more funds to create other advertising that is creative to capture the community in the future. One community that receives very limited services is the lgbt+ sexual assault victims. Rape and Sexual Assault doesn’t care about gender, color, and race; it cares about consent and that should be freely and soberly given. This community has been targeted because they are different from you, but in actuality they are stronger than you ever will be because they were brave enough to take your hits and your mean words and STILL live their TRUE ACTUAL SELVES no matter what you throw at them. We BELIEVE and SUPPORT every one.
Day 5: Faceless Portrait of an Advocate and/or Survivor
1st Mask “Living your truth” Living my truth has been a journey of identifying my pain and living it with purpose. Pain has purpose? My truth is I was sexually assaulted and victimized in and out of childhood/teenage years, but now I’m a survivor. I wore all kinds of masks, from overusing humor instead or feeling the real emotions of anger and crying when I was hurting and also reaching successful titles so I didn’t feel like a failure, to prove that I was getting better. The truth is I disguised my bitterness and guilt, shame with my striving, instead of acknowledging that I wasn’t happy and I really wanted to come out of that place of achieving to feel good inside. It’s okay to achieve and to laugh but mine wasn’t authentic. It took years of healing, it took years of pulling layers off my heart. But it was possible with faith, hope, and community to pursuing what I was really passionate about. I thought “If I feel like dying to confront these issues, than I rather die trying, than living like a walking dead man”. To take the masks off my face I had to lay down everything I thought was my identity. Living my truth required facing the lies I was believing about being raped. Lies like “No one will love me when they hear how many times I was touched.” Or “ my family won’t believe this person did that to me because they were a hero to many others.” My truth has been a journey of forgiving daily. The truth is no one should ever make you do something against your will. The truth is you didn’t do anything to be disrespected. The truth is you didn’t put yourself anywhere to allow that to happen to you. If your truth is you were sexually assaulted, and no one believes you, that is your truth and no one can take that from you . Believe in you, believe yourself. You are worthy enough to stand for your worth. I am living again. — Survivor. The “be believed here” mask is an advocate, so is the “show yourself one.” The other two are survivors. The last photo is a display we have in our office of several masks that advocates and survivors made. We gave them their power back and provide steps to heal. The mask was one of our favorite workshops because it let you show your true self without judgement. It showed you the face you show society and the face inside. Just because someone is smiling doesn’t mean there isn’t pain behind that smile.
Day 6: Attention to Detail
We hear it all the time: Why didn’t you fight back? Why didn’t you show emotion? Why did you let this just happen to you? Why did you not tell anyone until now? All of these are some of the questions a survivor is asked when they are assaulted. There are so many myths out there about what a “real” rape is and we have even had law enforcement say they have never experienced a “real” rape…well we are going to shed light on at least two myths and provide you the facts. Myth: If a victim of sexual assault does not fight back, they must have thought the assault was not that bad or they wanted it. Fact: Many survivors experience tonic immobility or a “freeze response” during an assault where they physically cannot move or speak. Myth: People that have been sexually assaulted will be hysterical and crying. Fact: Everyone responds differently to trauma- some may laugh, some may cry, and others will not show any emotions. Before you go to judge a person’s response, actions, or mindset make sure you have the facts first! We educate our local law enforcement all the time that every survivor responds differently to being assaulted. Just because they are laughing does not mean they are lying. We will always believe you. We support you. We listen to you. We hear you. If you are experiencing any triggering thoughts or feelings during this time our helpline is available with a live advocate standing by 24/7 to listen to you. If you or someone you know is looking to come forward or would like to just receive services in order to heal, please call our helpline or visit our page for more information and steps on what to do.
Day 7: Show Off Your Teal
Today is #DayOfAction “Wear Teal”
The amount of photos from our community, law enforcement, partnering agencies, state attorneys office, our advocates, and even our fur animals was so overwhelming, you truly made our hearts so happy! Thank you for showing your support today. This shows our survivors they are supported today and they are not alone. To all Survivors we are in your corner and WE Believe you!
This year, SAAM is celebrating its 19th anniversary with the theme “I Ask” to empower everyone to put consent into practice. We know that 1 month isn’t enough to solve the serious and widespread issue of sexual violence. However, the attention April generates is an opportunity to energize and expand prevention efforts throughout the year. It’s about more than awareness — our ultimate goal is prevention. Since consent is a clear, concrete example of what it takes to end sexual harassment, abuse, and assault, this year’s campaign shares the message that asking for consent is a normal and necessary part of sex.
Sexual assault is a serious and widespread problem. Individuals, communities, and the private sector are already successfully combating the risk of sexual harassment, misconduct, and abuse through conversations, programs, policies, and research-based tools that promote safety, respect, and equality.🦋
Day 8: Handwritten SAAM
As an advocate, we’ve had many adult victims who are non-reporting. What that means is they didn’t want to come forward in the judicial system to report their assailant(s). We as Advocates have learned to respect, provide quality care without discrimination and empower them to make decisions. How many voices live within these lines? Many say these victims were attacked by strangers#(s), couldn’t figure out who it was, drugged or drunk, too traumatic to remember. Those are some reasons. In many of my situations,they know assailant. A lot of times, loved one, someone they depended on, someone who controls them, a spouse, a person they trusted. Their silence has spoken more because of what I’ve seen happen in the judicial system, disbelief. Not enough evidence— as though the depression, hopelessness, lack of connection, isolation, and anxiety isn’t enough. I’m thankful Victims/Survivors reach out to our Rape Crisis Center despite those disappointments. Victims often times bite their tongue to feel safer. It’s already shameful enough to acknowledge it happened to now tell someone, or they feel guilty. We are confidentially available to people of all identities. As first responders, we are here to talk 24-Hour Helpline 1866-828-7273. People sit in silence and hurt because often speaking up causes more pain. If they’ve been hiding it for so long, it may be a trigger now. This pain usually is set ablaze by detectives or law enforcement that constantly question if it happened. It’s their job to try to collect evidence. Victims sit there and have to leave interviews knowing their abusers won’t be arrested. Not always because they weren’t believed, other times yes, but also because there isn’t enough evidence. Silence is safer because It’s better to be told they are a liar, if they didn’t know it was rape, than to face a judge, a police officer, a detective, a nurse, and even family members and not get justice. It’s safer for Victims to find comfort in silence because it doesn’t expose what was done to them, inside them. Important things to know: 1. You have the right to make your own decisions. A sexual assault , whether by stranger/acquaintance, can be very frightening. 2. Whether assault occurred recently or at sometime in the past survivors ….are often confused about what they should do next, and many question whether what happen was really rape at all, especially if they knew them. 3. They are frequently frightened to call or tell someone else because they worry that they will not be believed. Sometimes ashamed because of what happened and they blame themselves. In next picture you can see what’s important to remember and in 3rd picture what our program services do to help Victims heal. Reporting or non reporting.
Day 9: Doing Your Part Through Art🎨
Self-Care is so important when you’re in this field. Sometimes you need to step back and take a deep breath. Coloring is relaxing and may reduce stress, anxiety, depression, and PTSD. Burnout is real and advocates need to be sure to find the time for self-care because we can’t help others if we can’t help ourselves. We are not Super Heroes, sometimes you need to take the time for yourselves! We had some of our advocates share their own coloring creations. The butterfly is one of the most symbolic animals regarding the power of personal transformation. As a survivor, the butterfly effect in your life sets you on a path you never chose. It has affected you in negative ways, but you have the power to start a new butterfly effect, changing your life in the best ways possible. Consent is simple and easy. It’s a simple yes or no answer. Do not let anyone make you feel pressured into something you’re not ready to do. Don’t be afraid to speak up if you’re not ready. Consent is freely given with no hidden agendas! • yes means yes • no means no
Day 10: Bird’s Eye View
How does one capture consent from a birds eye view? By having it straight down in front of you. Consent is mandatory there’s no ifs ands or buts. We love the representation of FRIES: Freely Given Reversible Informed Enthusiastic Specific The problem is consent as a topic makes people so uncomfortable, but yet we can talk about sex and objectifying other genders like no problem. How is that possible? Consent is sexy, it’s fun, it’s loving, it’s something special between other people. Don’t let anyone stop you from speaking your mind. Find your voice and run with it. Consent is a simple yes or no answer. Don’t forget that! What does consent mean to you? Please share in the comments below! Let’s start a discussion and open peoples eyes to what consent is in all forms, shapes, and sizes.
Day 11: An Activist’s Morning Routine
Self-care is important when you’re an advocate. I can not stress that enough!! Your routine doesn’t always have to be the same either. If you change it up you’ll make things exciting because if you stick with the status quo you’ll get bored and stop. You do SO MUCH for others everyday for work by putting everyone else first, but today you need to put yourselves first!
One of our advocates, Siobhan, takes her dog for a walk while listening to music and bonding with Mother Nature. She says that it calms her when she is anxious and have been having a rough week. Some days she gets tired from work and lets the tired son, but some days she shoves it down and takes her dog, Gracie for a walk to different areas! Gracie loves all the new smells and even loves posing for the camera! Enjoy this fun video she put together of their morning routine!
One of our advocates, Ruth, takes so much joy in singing. Her voice is so beautiful and just puts you at ease by calming you. She said this song she loves because we focus so much on what goes wrong instead of being blessed for what we have. The lyric, “ This is the stuff that drives me crazy, this is the stuff that’s getting to me lately. In the middle of my little mess, I forget how big I’m blessed.” It means don’t let the negative take away from all the positives in your life. As survivors we need to find the strength to get back up and find the beauty in life again after it’s been taken away by someone not worthy.
Day 12: My Message to Survivors💛
There is no right way to feel, behave, or act. Don’t let anyone tel you otherwise. You will feel guilty, angry, numb, and some days you will feel fine; those are normal. Your mind and body will be yours again!❤️
A message of support from our home to yours. You are not alone. Support is available 24 hours a day.
Day 13: Spell It Out S-A-A-M📢
We love the interactive days where we can be creative with our giveaways! All of our giveaways have our logo with our helpline number on it which is available 24/7 with a certified rape crisis advocate waiting to listen to you. One of our advocates thought she would use the paints we have for our empowerment workshops to spell out SAAM in a creative way! During social distancing we have limited opportunities to be as creative as we like! Another advocate thought it’d be fun to make SAAM spelled out with her snack today! Animal crackers are not only delicious, but educational as well! As fun as this day is to be creative it’s spells out SAAM… so we would like to open this as a discussion, what does SAAM mean or look like to you? What’s your definition for it?
Day 14: Get Crafty DIY SAAM🎨🧶
We have a couple different DIY projects we did with some survivors and some staff! The first ones are from our Empowerment Workshop we have a human trafficking safe home make so they could have their voices heard! One survivor made a shirt with a poem she wrote and she told us she had a whole book full of poems and songs. That is how she’s getting through what she experienced. Another survivor made a shirt about her story, a survivor and the clocks represent three different times in her life at the exact hours each instance happened. We would love to share every shirt we had but here are a couple we wanted to share with you all! For our staff we wanted to paint some rocks to share with not only survivors, but everyone! We are hoping if you’re seeing this that this inspires you to make your own and share on your pages! If you do please tag us in the photo so we can see all your creations! One of our advocates, Ruth, wanted to share a photo she made on a canvas for the ribbon symbol in a different view. She used paints from our various workshops and wanted to embrace the survivors and that the sun shines again even though all you can see is darkness right now.
Day 15: From a distance, literally or figuratively, what does SAAM look like?
Sexual Assault Awareness Month looks like a future of many coming forward to celebrate that they have survived, believe each other, to thrive, to heal, to empower the silent. Many Victims don’t come forward and even the community/families can be silent about rape because it’s scary, stressing, shameful and embarrassing to face that it occurred so closely. We empathize and we respect when this is the reason for silence. We keep confidentiality close. From a distance, we hope that their voice will have power because they believe it does. We believe them.That the support would increase in their loved one. Where there is no judgment, but unconditional acceptance. When a Victim comes forward it is a huge act of bravery. To walk through the judicial process, is another stand of voicing for many other possible victims. SAAM from a distance looks like justice, like trust, like a community standing behind every victim and survivor and letting them know they are believed, respected , not alone. It looks like educating on consent! Educating on prevention! Ending Rape! Survivors cite the following reasons for not reporting a sexual assault: • Fear of reprisal • Personal matter • Reported to a different official • Not important enough to respondent • Belief that the police would not do anything to help • Belief that the police could not do anything to help • Did not want to get offender in trouble with law • Did not want family to know • Did not want others to know • Not enough proof • Fear of the justice system • Did not know how • Feel the crime was not “serious enough” • Fear of lack of evidence • Unsure about perpetrator’s intent Due partially to low reporting rates, only 9 percent of all rapists get prosecuted. Only 5 percent of cases lead to a felony conviction. Only 3 percent of rapists will spend a day in prison. The other 97 percent walk free. Probability Statistics Calculated By the Rape Abuse and Incest National Network, “Reporting Rates,” 2013
Day 16: An Activist’s Desk
Our program manager, Julie, has always had the best offices! We just love her decor of the woodsy creations she has in her office. It makes you feel so calming and at peace being in there. Julie’s energy matches her office she lets all of our survivors and advocates feel welcome in her office no matter what. Here she is busy at work while having her favorite snack, popcorn! Don’t forget to keep yourself hydrated as well with a water! If you notice in this picture you’ll get a sneak peak to one of our props for a future posting
Day 17: My Tribute to a Hero🦋
Day 18: The Real Teal
Teal has been the color we celebrate to symbolize and represent awareness for Sexual Assault Victims and Survivors. We lift a tribute to this bold and strong color, we want to thank those who stood in the gap to start this movement. Those who believed the broken enough to voice it back in the year 2000. Every opportunity we have to do outreach, educate students, join a community event, these teal bracelets run out. They have our 1866-828-7273 (Confidential Helpline 24 hrs) and our advocating statement and mission “Be Believed Here” be·lieve Verbaccept (something) as true; feel sure of the truth of. To believe (verb) is to take action— We thought of an opportunity to hand out something that could be worn, catch attention, spark a conversation and its FREE. We’ve had amazing conversations because of these teal bracelets. Conversations that have saved lives. No matter how shameful or unbelievable a sexual violence story is, we stand with Victims, we choose to NOT investigate them, on why they were where they were, what made them trust the assailant, force them to remember, question their trauma. We believe them. Period. They are not alone. It’s so important that we let our community know that we don’t need convincing to help someone. We do not discriminate on the basis of race, color, national origin, religion, sex, disability, and age in the delivery of services. Clients are able to confide in us. All communication with our Victim Advocates, Therapists, and Staff Members is confidential.
Day 19: Self-Care Snack Exchange
Jessica loves to start her mornings with her yogurt and granola! Sometimes the stress of the job as an advocate can get you down, BUT you must always remember to practice self-care! Self-care is as simple as taking a break to enjoy your yogurt and granola or even just a water break. Self-care is doing something for you and you alone. Every day you give and give to survivors, but you can’t continue to give if you don’t help yourself first. “Self-care is never a selfish act – it is simply good stewardship of the only gift I have, the gift I was put on earth to offer others. Anytime we can listen to true self and give the care it requires, we do it not only for ourselves, but for the many others whose lives we touch.” – Parker Palmer. Remember to take time for yourself
Day 20: During SAAM, I Am…
During SAAM, I am… reflecting on my feelings about why I’m so thankful for the places I went to when I was a victim, to heal /find peace. Being isolated has taught me to appreciate the freedom I found there and still find there. I am thankful for memories. I once was a victim and today I’m a Victim Advocate. Both just as important. I never thought my life would become a support to those who faced what I faced for almost 2 decades. I come to beach parks for sunrises a lot, to reflect on how far I’ve made it and where I want to be. My feelings are best represented through this picture. Today I told myself “ I never thought I would get strong enough to help others because I didn’t feel free from the negative thoughts of shame. I was so embarrassed, but it started when I believed in myself and told myself that if I wanted to die, then I should die trying first…for healing, hope, self-confidence.” I tried the things that made me happy. I tried the things that made me feel free. I tried facing whatever made me feel dead after — like telling my story and writing my emotions in the nature and then dancing it off in the open day… I began to live again. Flagging in nature is my safe haven, where every sunset is a reminder that endings can be beautiful too, where my flags are like wings. Where I’m reminded that there was a time where I was just a caterpillar; I felt so tiny and so hidden, but after much living in darkness and choosing transformation, I’m a butterfly. “Beautiful to watch, hard to catch.” I’m unstoppable. Immovable. I’m FREE. Even when I’m alone, I feel secure. Even when the memories come, I go to this place and repeat the trying. Some Victims of Sexual violence have trauma that is different and I can never say I understand but I choose to try to be there and be the support I once had in my place. Can’t wait to go back! Picture of me flagging. I can’t tell you that I’ve been reflecting a lot about how much I’ve taken for granted but it’s a good change.
Day 21: Everyday Consent is Normal & Necessary🛑🚫
Being a victim advocate for sexual assault doesn’t just mean you’re assigned cases and provide follow up care, but also outreach. Community Outreach is one of our bigger roles of the job. We educate the community and and our local businesses about our program and the benefits to the community. We provide open discussions: •consent • safety plan • victims rights • non-reporting vs reporting • community referrals We will have tables setup at various resource fairs, but we find having our media stand really draws the community to our table. One thing that really helps us stand out is our Yearly Stats for our program. When people read that it opens their eyes to how serious this issue is and YES IT HAPPENS HERE! When we can start an open dialogue with our community we are able to share about consent and the myths associated with that. You’d be surprised how many people are shocked when we tell them what is and isn’t consent. “𝐒𝐢𝐥𝐞𝐧𝐜𝐞 𝐝𝐨𝐞𝐬 𝐧𝐨𝐭 𝐦𝐞𝐚𝐧 𝐲𝐞𝐬. 𝐍𝐨 𝐜𝐚𝐧 𝐛𝐞 𝐭𝐡𝐨𝐮𝐠𝐡𝐭 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐟𝐞𝐥𝐭 𝐛𝐮𝐭 𝐧𝐞𝐯𝐞𝐫 𝐬𝐚𝐢𝐝. 𝐈𝐭 𝐜𝐚𝐧 𝐛𝐞 𝐬𝐜𝐫𝐞𝐚𝐦𝐞𝐝 𝐬𝐢𝐥𝐞𝐧𝐭𝐥𝐲 𝐨𝐧 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐢𝐧𝐬𝐢𝐝𝐞. 𝐈𝐭 𝐜𝐚𝐧 𝐛𝐞 𝐢𝐧 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐰𝐨𝐫𝐝𝐥𝐞𝐬𝐬 𝐬𝐭𝐨𝐧𝐞 𝐨𝐟 𝐚 𝐜𝐥𝐞𝐧𝐜𝐡𝐞𝐝 𝐟𝐢𝐬𝐭, 𝐟𝐢𝐧𝐠𝐞𝐫𝐧𝐚𝐢𝐥𝐬 𝐝𝐢𝐠𝐠𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐢𝐧𝐭𝐨 𝐩𝐚𝐥𝐦. 𝐇𝐞𝐫 𝐥𝐢𝐩𝐬 𝐬𝐞𝐚𝐥𝐞𝐝. 𝐇𝐞𝐫 𝐞𝐲𝐞𝐬 𝐜𝐥𝐨𝐬𝐞𝐝. 𝐇𝐢𝐬 𝐛𝐨𝐝𝐲 𝐣𝐮𝐬𝐭 𝐭𝐚𝐤𝐢𝐧𝐠, 𝐧𝐞𝐯𝐞𝐫 𝐚𝐬𝐤𝐢𝐧𝐠, 𝐧𝐞𝐯𝐞𝐫 𝐭𝐚𝐮𝐠𝐡𝐭 𝐭𝐨 𝐪𝐮𝐞𝐬𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧 𝐬𝐢𝐥𝐞𝐧𝐜𝐞.” – 𝐀𝐦𝐲 𝐑𝐞𝐞𝐝, 𝐓𝐡𝐞 𝐍𝐨𝐰𝐡𝐞𝐫𝐞 𝐆𝐢𝐫𝐥𝐬.
Day 22: When Pop Culture Gets It Right
ᴡᴇ ᴅᴇᴄɪᴅᴇᴅ ᴛᴏ sʜᴀʀᴇ ғᴏʀ ᴛʜɪs ᴘᴏsᴛ ᴛᴡᴏ ᴍᴏᴠɪᴇs ᴀɴᴅ ᴛᴡᴏ ᴛᴠ sʜᴏᴡs ᴛᴏ sʜᴀʀᴇ ᴛᴡᴏ ᴍᴏᴠɪᴇs ᴀɴᴅ ᴛᴡᴏ sʜᴏᴡs ᴡʜᴇʀᴇ ᴡᴇ ʙᴇʟɪᴇᴠᴇ ᴘᴏᴘ ᴄᴜʟᴛᴜʀᴇ ɢᴏᴛ ɪᴛ ʀɪɢʜᴛ: Thelma and JD, Thelma and Louise In the scene with Thelma and JD they are starting to have sex and Thelma suddenly stops and says, “Wait. Wait.” And JD immediately stops and waits. He says nothing or does nothing until she DECIDES she’s ready to start again. Past movies have shown that getting consent from someone as a negative so watching this scene demonstrate exactly what consent means and how it could change all in an instant no matter what. Anna and Kristoff, Frozen “I could kiss you! I could. I mean, I’d like to. I. May I? We me? I mean, may we? Wait, what?” (Smile.) “We may.” This scene may come across as silly, but it shows Kristoff asking Anna for her permission to kiss her. Movies have shown that grabbing someone and kissing them is romantic, whether they have consent or not. This scene depicts exactly what consent means in society. Law & Order SVU “SVU emphasizes both the crime and the punishment, as well as the harm done to the victim — all of which helps make the importance of consent more real.” Law and Order opens the nation’s eyes to consent and sexual assault; most of their episodes involves some type of discussion about consent from anywhere to their professions to ages. It is one of the longest running network shows and continues to increase its following every season by tackling some of the current issues in the media others are scared to discuss. This episode was one of my favorites to watch, it not only discussed consent it also showed what a rape kit entails. I don’t believe I have watched many shows where they go into serious detail of the whole rape kit experience. This whole episodes leaves you with chills from beginning to end. Thank you Grey’s Anatomy for sharing this episode and showing the point of view of a victim/survivor that the world needs to see. Sexual assault isn’t black and white; it’s every color of the spectrum. Silent All These Years, Grey’s Anatomy
Day 23: Behind the Scenes & Outtakes
he beginning of this challenge I would make it all about how each posting has to be perfect, blah blah blah….what I was missing out on was I need to just enjoy the moment. Life is always a constant rollercoaster and you never know what each day will bring; but one thing that is true is don’t forget to enjoy the moment because you’ll never be able to replay this day again. I have really enjoyed everyone’s posting and the creativity every has is blowing me away! •••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••• This year we weren’t able to throw an event for SAAM, but we have been able to broaden horizons while reaching people now virtually via social media! We wanted to share a few photos from behind the scenes of SAAM! • Arts & crafts • Awareness dates • coloring in the lines •••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••• Can’t wait to see what everyone posts! Let’s bring some silliness into this world when everyone is so uncertain what tomorrow will bring!
Day 24: Teal Ribbon in the Wild
The ribbon to us is just like the butterfly; “We admire the beauty of the butterfly but we rarely admit the changes it has gone through to achieve that beauty.” – Maya Angelou This is our ribbon plant which hangs in our program manager, Julie’s office everyday! Today we wanted to bring it out into the Wild and let nature bring out its beauty. “You’re not a victim for sharing your story. You are a survivor setting the world on fire with your truth. And you never know who needs your light, your warmth, and raging courage.” – Alex Elle
Day 25: An Activist’s Treasured Item
We just love our giveaways! They ready bring people to our tables at events and it also has our 24/7 rape crisis helpline so if someone is in need we can provide our giveaways!
Day 26: Black and White Believing Survivors
Show a black and white issue about sexual assault? It’s simple… 𝐒𝐓𝐀𝐑𝐓 𝐁𝐘 𝐁𝐄𝐋𝐈𝐄𝐕𝐈𝐍𝐆 them when they tell you they were assaulted. 𝐒𝐓𝐎𝐏 asking questions why, what, when, who…and start by saying I believe you and you are not alone, I’m here for you. Simple as that. Surprisingly, believing survivors hasn’t become as simple as black and white. Society throws in excuses for why someone is raped or assaulted. They like to victim blame instead of looking at the people who assault them and ask why? Instead the survivors get questioned 𝐖𝐇𝐀𝐓 were you wearing or 𝐖𝐇𝐘 did you let yourself be alone with him; pretty much letting survivors think it’s their fault. Last I checked breathing doesn’t = consent. 𝐇𝐎𝐖 about we ask the survivors, 𝐖𝐇𝐀𝐓 can we do for you or 𝐇𝐎𝐖 can I help you or event 𝐖𝐇𝐎 do you want to call. The survivors have gone through something so traumatic where they lose their voices and power. We need to start believing the survivors when they tell us something happened! •Help Them Find Their Voices • Regain Their Control • Give Back Their Power We pledge to believe you when you tell us something happens to you – SAAP Team
Day 27: In This Together – Words of Thanks💛
𝐖𝐄 𝐀𝐑𝐄 𝐈𝐍 𝐓𝐇𝐈𝐒 𝐓𝐎𝐆𝐄𝐓𝐇𝐄𝐑! Today and every day, the staff of the Sexual Assault Assistance Program is here for you. We are thankful to our outreach staff who have learned to be creative in providing outreach during these times. Throughout the month of April, our outreach staff have been working hard participating in #30DaysOfSAAM by sharing stories, videos, and messages of hope and aspiration for all survivors. Currently, we are doing our part to “flatten the curve” by following all CDC and state guidelines in providing all of our services remotely. We really. We really miss being there in person, but we are committed to staying by your side whether by phone, FaceTime, or Zoom until it is safe to visit in person. We are thankful to our local hospital personnel and law enforcement agencies that have continued to call us and make sure that we can connect with victims of sexual assault to provide crisis intervention, advocacy, and accompaniment services. We are thankful for our helpline advocates who are available 24/7 to provide rape crisis services and offer a listening ear. We are thankful for our sexual assault advocates that have been working in the office, following up and keeping survivors informed of their case statuses. *Photo taken prior to social distancing* We will get through this and we will be stronger because of it!
Day 28: Smile, good things are Happening!
Today is a selfie or a representation of my hope for a future free of sexual assault. Honestly, being a survivor myself, the best way to describe who I am and how I feel today , is my Smile.🙂 One of the biggest issues as a victim, I felt exposed, I felt my innocence was stolen. But my hope for a future free of SA in the life of others is that every human can smile! Be happy! again!The definition of a smile is a “pleased, kind, amused facial expression, typically with the corners of the mouth turned up, the front teeth exposed.” I will EXPOSE what was taken from me and it was really my happiness/my voice. We want to feel good! I want to let victims/survivors know that good things are happening. I’m still laughing!creating! I get to help 1 in 5 & 1 in 71 victims. One life is a big deal! I hope you can join me! I’m still putting my feelings on canvases to heal, and this one is of my hopes for a future free of sexual assault. Full life in families. Global justice! The eye represents that you are seen and you will see life again. Tragedy will not destroy our view on life. You are the center of someone’s world, for who you really are, not what was done to you. The nature represents the life and blooming that takes place when Earth is taken care of, and that’s what we all have in common. Earth. We must protect each other and that’s how we grow together. My hope is that no one should ever have to shed tears for the wrongs reasons. The red tears represents love & passion that hides deep inside our pain. Without pain we wouldn’t understand healing. & because there’s so much fear of reliving this moment when we’re with someone we love, I know some are really crying for love and affection. Sexual abuse should not stop us from hoping in love and sex with security ! And consent! Stay hopeful! I identify myself with butterflies and this is one of favorite quotes: The butterfly said to the sun, “They can’t stop talking about my transformation. I can only do it once in my lifetime. If only they know they can do it at any time and in countless ways.” -Dodinsky 💛🦋🎗
Day 29: Denim Day – Wear Jeans with a Purpose👖
Denim day is about letting sexual assault survivors know that they are not alone. Along the Treasure Coast we have come together to support you in a way that lets you know that we are here. Here to listen, believe you, and comfort you. Your voice shall always be heard to us and we will continue to fight for your rights as advocates, friends, family, prosecutors, and peers of your community💛🦋🤝
Day 30: At the End of SAAM – Share a snapshot that captures your progress or reflections at the end of the month
𝐖𝐨𝐰, 𝐭𝐢𝐦𝐞 𝐬𝐮𝐫𝐞 𝐟𝐥𝐞𝐰 𝐛𝐲! 𝐖𝐞 𝐬𝐭𝐢𝐥𝐥 𝐜𝐚𝐧’𝐭 𝐛𝐞𝐥𝐢𝐞𝐯𝐞 𝐭𝐡𝐚𝐭 𝐰𝐞 𝐡𝐚𝐯𝐞 𝐫𝐞𝐚𝐜𝐡𝐞𝐝 𝐨𝐮𝐫 𝐟𝐢𝐧𝐚𝐥 𝐝𝐚𝐲 𝐨𝐟 𝐒𝐀𝐀𝐌! 𝐖𝐞 𝐡𝐚𝐯𝐞 𝐭𝐫𝐮𝐥𝐲 𝐞𝐧𝐣𝐨𝐲𝐞𝐝 𝐬𝐞𝐞𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐞𝐯𝐞𝐫𝐲𝐨𝐧𝐞’𝐬 𝐜𝐫𝐞𝐚𝐭𝐢𝐯𝐞 𝐩𝐨𝐬𝐭𝐬 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐥𝐨𝐯𝐞 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐟𝐚𝐜𝐭 𝐰𝐞 𝐡𝐚𝐯𝐞 𝐜𝐨𝐦𝐞 𝐭𝐨𝐠𝐞𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐫 𝐟𝐨𝐫 𝐬𝐮𝐫𝐯𝐢𝐯𝐨𝐫𝐬 𝐝𝐮𝐫𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐬 𝐩𝐚𝐧𝐝𝐞𝐦𝐢𝐜. 𝐃𝐮𝐫𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐒𝐀𝐀𝐌 𝐞𝐯𝐞𝐫𝐲𝐨𝐧𝐞 𝐡𝐨𝐬𝐭𝐬 𝐞𝐯𝐞𝐧𝐭𝐬, 𝐰𝐨𝐫𝐤𝐬𝐡𝐨𝐩𝐬, 𝐩𝐚𝐧𝐞𝐥𝐬, 𝐞𝐭𝐜. 𝐛𝐮𝐭 𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐬 𝐲𝐞𝐚𝐫 𝐰𝐞 𝐰𝐞𝐫𝐞 𝐨𝐧𝐥𝐲 𝐚𝐛𝐥𝐞 𝐭𝐨 𝐜𝐞𝐥𝐞𝐛𝐫𝐚𝐭𝐞 𝐭𝐡𝐫𝐨𝐮𝐠𝐡 𝐬𝐨𝐜𝐢𝐚𝐥 𝐦𝐞𝐝𝐢𝐚. 𝐄𝐯𝐞𝐧 𝐭𝐡𝐨𝐮𝐠𝐡 𝐰𝐞 𝐰𝐞𝐫𝐞 𝐩𝐫𝐚𝐜𝐭𝐢𝐜𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐬𝐨𝐜𝐢𝐚𝐥 𝐝𝐢𝐬𝐭𝐚𝐧𝐜𝐢𝐧𝐠; 𝐢𝐭 𝐟𝐞𝐞𝐥𝐬 𝐥𝐢𝐤𝐞 𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐬 𝐲𝐞𝐚𝐫 𝐢𝐭 𝐛𝐫𝐨𝐮𝐠𝐡𝐭 𝐚𝐥𝐥 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐫𝐚𝐩𝐞 𝐜𝐫𝐢𝐬𝐢𝐬 𝐜𝐞𝐧𝐭𝐞𝐫𝐬, 𝐬𝐮𝐫𝐯𝐢𝐯𝐨𝐫𝐬, 𝐨𝐫𝐠𝐚𝐧𝐢𝐳𝐚𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧𝐬, 𝐜𝐨𝐦𝐦𝐮𝐧𝐢𝐭𝐲, 𝐞𝐭𝐜. 𝐜𝐥𝐨𝐬𝐞𝐫 𝐭𝐨𝐠𝐞𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐫. 𝐖𝐞 𝐰𝐞𝐫𝐞 𝐚𝐛𝐥𝐞 𝐭𝐨 𝐟𝐨𝐫𝐦 𝐧𝐞𝐰 𝐥𝐚𝐬𝐭𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐛𝐨𝐧𝐝𝐬 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐥𝐞𝐚𝐧 𝐨𝐧 𝐞𝐚𝐜𝐡 𝐨𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐫 𝐟𝐨𝐫 𝐬𝐮𝐩𝐩𝐨𝐫𝐭. 𝐒𝐞𝐱𝐮𝐚𝐥 𝐀𝐬𝐬𝐚𝐮𝐥𝐭 𝐀𝐰𝐚𝐫𝐞𝐧𝐞𝐬𝐬 𝐌𝐨𝐧𝐭𝐡 𝐢𝐬𝐧’𝐭 𝐣𝐮𝐬𝐭 𝐚𝐛𝐨𝐮𝐭 𝐩𝐨𝐬𝐭𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐨𝐧 𝐬𝐨𝐜𝐢𝐚𝐥 𝐦𝐞𝐝𝐢𝐚 𝐞𝐯𝐞𝐫𝐲 𝐝𝐚𝐲 𝐢𝐭 𝐰𝐚𝐬 𝐦𝐨𝐫𝐞 𝐚𝐛𝐨𝐮𝐭 𝐫𝐞𝐚𝐜𝐡𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐨𝐮𝐭 𝐭𝐨 𝐭𝐡𝐨𝐬𝐞 𝐰𝐡𝐨 𝐚𝐫𝐞 𝐮𝐧𝐚𝐛𝐥𝐞 𝐭𝐨 𝐜𝐨𝐦𝐞 𝐟𝐨𝐫𝐰𝐚𝐫𝐝; 𝐭𝐡𝐨𝐬𝐞 𝐰𝐡𝐨 𝐚𝐫𝐞 𝐧𝐨𝐭 𝐫𝐞𝐚𝐝𝐲 𝐭𝐨 𝐮𝐬𝐞 𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐢𝐫 𝐯𝐨𝐢𝐜𝐞. 𝐖𝐞 𝐚𝐫𝐞 𝐠𝐢𝐯𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐦 𝐚 𝐯𝐢𝐫𝐭𝐮𝐚𝐥 𝐡𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐭𝐨 𝐡𝐨𝐥𝐝 𝐰𝐡𝐞𝐧 𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐲 𝐚𝐫𝐞 𝐫𝐞𝐚𝐝𝐲 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐚𝐛𝐥𝐞 𝐭𝐨 𝐜𝐨𝐦𝐞 𝐟𝐨𝐫𝐰𝐚𝐫𝐝. When trying to decide what photo to post we thought long and hard about what our reflections from the month would be? Well we decided why not include every day we posted! We formed it in a heart because our progress for the future is to show our survivors we are connected, we will always believe you and you can trust in us. The meaning behind a heart is that it shows compassion and understanding, life-giving and complex. No one’s story is the same, we want you to feel safe when you come to us. We are here for you. WE BELIEVE YOU! We delight in the beauty of the butterfly, but rarely admit the changes it has gone through to achieve that beauty.” – мαуα αиgєℓσυ The butterfly is one the most symbolic animals regarding the power of personal transformation. As a survivor of sexual abuse, the butterfly effect in your life set you on a path you never chose. It has affected you in negative ways, but you have the power to start a new butterfly effect, changing your life in the best way possible. 𝐘𝐨𝐮 𝐜𝐚𝐧 𝐛𝐞 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐛𝐮𝐭𝐭𝐞𝐫𝐟𝐥𝐲 𝐢𝐧 𝐲𝐨𝐮𝐫 𝐨𝐰𝐧 𝐥𝐢𝐟𝐞 𝐭𝐡𝐚𝐭 𝐜𝐚𝐮𝐬𝐞𝐬 𝐩𝐨𝐬𝐢𝐭𝐢𝐯𝐞 𝐞𝐟𝐟𝐞𝐜𝐭𝐬 𝐟𝐨𝐫 𝐲𝐨𝐮 𝐛𝐲 𝐦𝐚𝐤𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐠𝐨𝐨𝐝 𝐝𝐞𝐜𝐢𝐬𝐢𝐨𝐧𝐬 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐜𝐚𝐫𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐟𝐨𝐫 𝐲𝐨𝐮𝐫𝐬𝐞𝐥𝐟 𝐰𝐢𝐭𝐡 𝐤𝐢𝐧𝐝𝐧𝐞𝐬𝐬. 𝐘𝐨𝐮 𝐦𝐚𝐲 𝐧𝐨𝐭 𝐛𝐞 𝐚𝐛𝐥𝐞 𝐭𝐨 𝐬𝐞𝐞 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐛𝐢𝐠 𝐩𝐢𝐜𝐭𝐮𝐫𝐞 𝐲𝐞𝐭, 𝐛𝐮𝐭 𝐢𝐧 𝐭𝐢𝐦𝐞, 𝐛𝐞𝐟𝐨𝐫𝐞 𝐲𝐨𝐮 𝐤𝐧𝐨𝐰 𝐢𝐭, 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐥𝐢𝐭𝐭𝐥𝐞 𝐟𝐥𝐚𝐩 𝐨𝐟 𝐚 𝐰𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐡𝐚𝐬 𝐭𝐮𝐫𝐧𝐞𝐝 𝐢𝐧𝐭𝐨 𝐚 𝐭𝐫𝐚𝐧𝐬𝐟𝐨𝐫𝐦𝐞𝐝 𝐥𝐢𝐟𝐞 𝐟𝐫𝐞𝐞 𝐨𝐟 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐩𝐚𝐬𝐭 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐬𝐨𝐚𝐫𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐭𝐨𝐰𝐚𝐫𝐝𝐬 𝐭𝐨𝐦𝐨𝐫𝐫𝐨𝐰. 𝐓𝐡𝐞 𝐝𝐞𝐜𝐢𝐬𝐢𝐨𝐧𝐬 𝐲𝐨𝐮 𝐦𝐚𝐤𝐞 𝐭𝐨𝐝𝐚𝐲 𝐦𝐚𝐭𝐭𝐞𝐫.
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